I’ve spent the better part of the last 14 years in Christian Counseling. It is one of the greatest and deepest ways God has grown me. And much of that growth has come from a good deal of demolition.
I have had four different Counselors over the years as well as a two Spiritual Mentors. Each of them has been used by God in very specific ways, in very unique seasons to shape and transform me into who I am today. While each of them are very different in their approach, they all share this in common – They are Masters of Demolition! The growth that has come…has come from destruction of one form or another. They each have masterfully managed to help me tear down faulty foundations, unnecessary additions, and lovingly partner with God to help rebuild me in profound ways.
The view from my current Counselors office is incredibly apropos – it’s a Skyscraper on Michigan Ave that is being torn down to the dirt! Gazing out his window at this process has lead me to reflect on Three Things that I have Learned about Counseling from watching Demolition.
1) Every building has issues.
Every building, even the newest and most beautiful buildings have issues inside. Faulty plumbing, hastily constructed walls, peeling paint and falling bricks. The same is true of you. This is just an inescapable truth. No matter how well put together you think you are, no matter how “good’ you look on the outside…there are always issues that need attending. This is as true of you as it is every other person you make eye contact with today. While the Blueprint of our Soul is perfectly designed by God, our bodies exist in a broken world. We are exposed to the elements of a world ravaged by sin. The sooner you can accept and identify your brokenness, the sooner your healing and renovation can begin.
2) Tearing Down is a part of Building Up.
The issue with the structural issues of my life is simply that…they are MY ISSUES. I’ve spent a lifetime with them. In many cases, I’ve built my life on and around them. They have been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. And I simply cannot be objective about them. If I could…they wouldn’t be my issues. One of the most important steps in my transformation, and easily the scariest, is accepting that there are things that need to be torn down. That I need to let go of many of the things that got me this far. That it’s gonna get a lot messier before it gets better. That tearing down is a part of building up. And that God is building a new foundation for my life, fully rooted in Him.
3) The Dust never settles.
For my first couple of years of counseling I genuinely believed that the goal was to be fully fixed. Yes, I’ve got issues, but after a couple of sessions or a couple of months or a couple of years…I won’t! Maybe you’ve thought the same. But for anyone who’s ever owned a house…and lived in it for more than a couple of years, you know that there’s ALWAYS something to be worked on. The same is true of you and me. While I have genuinely grown and seen God do great healing in my life through counseling…I have yet to “arrive”. The deeper I go, the more I find. This can seem incredibly discouraging at first, but it’s actually a gift. The greater the awareness and acceptance of my brokenness, the greater dependence can grow in my life. The goal of this life with God is not “Arriving” but rather “Becoming” – becoming ALL of who God has created me to be! The dust never settles in this life. Heaven is the only “Dust Free” environment I will ever be a part of. So until then, I celebrate transformation and embrace the mess that comes with it.
These are just a few (three to be exact) of the things I’ve learned about Counseling from watching Demolition out my my counselors window. I’d love to hear about your journey? What have you learned? Is counseling a part of your Spiritual Transformation? How is God growing you up by lovingly tearing down?